Can Hope Float To High?

I’ve always been a huge believer in hope.  Maybe that’s why, while I hate romantic movies, I love Hope Floats. Birdie Calvert says in it that if you give hope a chance to float, it will– but can you let go and let it float too high?

If you let your hope float up and soak up more an more, can it become too high and too big?  I feel like I’ve lost control of my hopes for the guy I’m seeing and our relationship.  I like him, entirely, but at the same time I’m scared that my hopes are too big.

I’m not saying that I want to give up on the hopes with him, but I just want to reign them in a little bit. Is it possible to pull back hopes that are out too high?

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A Year Ago…

This coming weekend will be a year since the day you walked back into my life, but I had no idea that day or even in the weeks following it how important you would soon become to me. That day at a friends wedding I noticed you, we traded phone numbers after discovering we lived near each other and planned to catch up on our recent lives.

Did you know that a year later you’d be referring to me as your significant other and I’d be posting pictures of us on Facebook? Did I have any clue that I’d be talking to my friends about the outfit I bought with the sole purpose of “wowing” you when you took me out to celebrate my birthday?

It’s crazy to me looking back on this past year and how I hadn’t thought of you in years and this past year I’m not sure if a single day has passed without you crossing my mind.

I wonder where we’ll be one year from now…

Could Have Been Written From My Heart

There I was, driving down the road to my apartment after a nice workout…. when this song came on the radio I hadn’t heard before, so I turned it up.  Almost immediately the tears were welling up in my eyes as this song was speaking to me.

It was reminding me of everything I needed to remember about the guy I’m dating and why he isn’t ready for a relationship but at the same time it was everything I wish I could tell him about how I feel for him.  Songs are often referenced as a way of expressing what we can’t or to figure thing out we need help with.  But this song serves as a reminder for what I can’t let myself forget and also what I wish I could express.

Brad Paisley’s song “I Can’t Change The World” could have been written straight out of my heart, but hearing it on the radio lets me know that I’m not the first or the only to feel this way about someone who’s guarded their heart after a past heartbreak.

 

Lyrics to Brad Paisley’s “I Can’t Change The World”

A gun goes off in a far off city
A siren wails right here at home
Well sometimes life ain’t all that pretty
When you’re watching it all alone

You build a wall around your feelings
Just another heart afraid to break
And you don’t wanna let me in cause really
What difference can I make?

I can’t change the world
Baby, that’s for sure
But if you let me, girl
I can change yours
I bet I can change yours

So let Jesus look down on this mess
And let the powers that be just fuss and fight
Cause everyone needs to pick their battles and
We all realize

That I can’t change the world
Baby, that’s for sure
But if you let me, girl
I can change yours
I bet I can change yours

And every time you light a flame
You just get burned and you feel like
It’s all in vain
You feel like
You need to learn that no one’s gonna save you
No, no one’s gonna save you
But I’m standing here
My heart’s on my sleeve
Never gonna let you down
Never ever gonna leave you

Baby, that’s for sure
Oh I can’t change the world
But I can change yours
I bet I can change yours

There’s no way out unscathed

I don’t think there’s a safe way out of casual dating… I’m too wrapped up.  I’ve been “casually” dating this guy for four months now… but our relationship has really been that, a relationship, just without the titles of boyfriend and girlfriend.

I’ve realized that it’s past the point of no return.  There’s no way for this to go back to the way it was– us being friends.  At this point we either keep going and making memories, falling deeper into this relationship or I walk away with a broken heart that I’ll never admit to having.

Lucky for me– that doesn’t have to be decided today.  Only time will tell which path we are on– but time has already decided that there’s no way out of this relationship scenario unscathed. One path leads to more and one leads to hurt… there’s no turning around.

What If It Doesn’t Work Out? What If It Does?

How many times do we ask ourselves or each other– “what if it doesn’t work out?”  A LOT.  But let me ask you, how many times do we ask ourselves or each other– “what if it does work?”  I can tell you, I’ve rarely if ever asked that question.

I wonder if we doom ourselves and our relationships by asking the negative question, not the positive one? Does asking “what if it doesn’t work out?” force us to go into the relationship seeing the end? Taking precautions so that if and when it’s over we are somehow prepared for it?  What would happen if we went into relationships asking “what if this works?”  Would we have a greater chance of being happy in the relationship? Would there be a higher chance that things really would work out?

Share your story! Have you ever gone heads first into something thinking “it could work this time?”  I want to know! Thoughts?

Relationships– A Canyon.

Lately I’ve been trying to be a better version of myself.

That means a different thing daily, but one thing that has been involved in that process is strengthening those relationships that make me- me. The relationships that over time have molded me and shaped me– the ones who have challenged me, helped me to rise up, taught me to bend and so much more.  Much like a river can transform a valley into a work of art like a canyon– I feel like God places friends in our lives to transform each of us into the work of art that we are.

I’ve realized through a long-distance friend that while all of the moments in a friendship might not have been easy or beautiful, in the end something amazing is created.  A bond that can’t be broken and two pictures that couldn’t look the same without the other.  A river needs a canyon as much as the canyon needs the river so to speak– one to carve the other and the other to house the other.

A huge thank you to my friend for being my river and helping to cut away at my rougher edges and always being there with your constant love and support, and for always looking for the start of something beautiful in my own life– even when I haven’t been looking.

I hope you all have a friend who is either the river to your canyon or who you are the river to theirs.

Quotes that Take Your Breathe Away

Maybe it’s my ties to all things anchor-related or maybe it’s because I’ve been fighting so hard to stay calm and on the ground while my hopes and heart have been trying to fly to the clouds– but I saw this quote and stopped in my tracks.

Isn’t that what we want in life?  We want to stay put on the ground while imagining greatness.  More than that– we want that experience with someone else and hope that they want it with us too.

There’s nothing wrong with sailing through the sky when our hearts and hopes are rising, but we need to stay tied to the earth in case things don’t work out as planned so that the fall doesn’t hit us with a full impact.  This quote took my breathe away because it embodied so much that has been in my mind and heart lately, but summed it up into one little sentence.

What quotes speak to you and stop you from breathing?

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